All is Fair in Love and War
by Coda Cat
Summary: Our favorite Invader is still on Earth, so far unable to conquer Earth, under the watchful and accusing eyes of the Dibmonkey. The Tallest, have decided to send someone to get rid of the little, green pest and take his mission, which might prove useful. C
1. The Academy for Future Invaders

The Academy for Future Invaders

An alien instructor barked commands, at a group of young aliens, in a large, fenced-in area. It was outdoors, and hot, from one of their closest suns. They weren't exactly smeets, but they were not fully grown. They all had the same mint-green skin, long coal black gloves covering all the way up to their elbows, and a pair of black antennae. Most of them had ruby-red eyes, but their was an occasional plum in the bunch. All these traits showed their true race. These were Irken youngsters, training to be Invaders, when they finally passed the Complete Test.

"Jump that pit!" Ah, yes. It was part of, the infamous Test. These aliens, who were separated from the rest, were taking their final test. If they graduated, they'd be allowed, to be an Invader. First, they must ask permission to prove themselves worthy, of the title, from the Tallest, aka. the Irken Leaders. And by the Tallest, I use the term literally. The Tallest were actually the tallest of all their race. Funny, huh? Ok, back to the testing.

The first alien in line took a running start, and leapt. He just missed and fell, but hung on, by the edge. He climbed out and looked a bit dazed. He'd passed, but was most likely not going to be, a "good invader". You needed perfect accuracy on these things, and apparently, he didn't have it. There were only a select few, who had been doing that good. Next, was a very short male. He completely missed, and was zapped up, in a light, just before his hit the magma below. Another failure.

"Next!" Shouted the trainer, shaking his head and feeling horrible. At least one of them, had to do it. Another stepped forward. This Irken was about twice the size of the tiny one, who didn't make it. That was a plus, on the last part of, the Test. They got a running start, just like the others, but just before they jumped, legs shot out of their pack and held them up safely, as the Irken landed, perfectly on the other side. The coach walked over to this alien.

"Good. You used your brains. Now, let's say you didn't have your Pak. What would you do, then?"

"Jump it, of course." Replied the Irken. The voice made it clear that this was a female. For some reason, most females hadn't done well on the Test. However, so far, she was doing the opposite and it pleased the instructor.

"Kar, I'd like you to do it again. No Pak. Go on."

The alien female, called Kar, walked around the crevice, and back to the starting point. The head Irken signed for her to go, and she ran. Her tracks made the dirt into dust. Had she made it? As the dust cleared, and the other aliens who were on that side watched her do it, they all could see her triumph. This made the teacher ecstatic. One of his students was…

"First to pass the Complete Test! Congratulations, Kar! You've done it! You shall be notified, when we have got through, to the Tallest. You may go collect your belongings, and head to the Station. Await confirmation, there."

"Yes, Sir." She answered, obediently.

Kar smiled, and raised one fist in the air. Ha! She'd done it! The others, who had been waiting in line, all watched her, angry that they hadn't been the first, and praying to Mother Irk, they would not fail. She ignored their mixed looks and walked to her "dome". The door slid open, and the female entered. It was similar to a human dorm, and where she had lived, while learning and training, at the Irken Academy. She said her farewells, to her two dome-mates, who'd shared it with her, grabbed her bag of things and headed to the Station. The Station, was where she would send out her message, and contact the Tallest. She was so happy! They'd be awfully glad, to speak with the First to Finish, right? Kar hoped so. With another triumphant look, she walked through the doors and into the first room. This was her chance, and she vowed not to take no for an answer.

Author's notes:

Coda: Ha! Cliff-hanger!

Zim: Why am I not in this chapter? What is going to happen? Tell me! Tell me! –repeats this phrase, in different voices, till it becomes extremely annoying-

Coda: Zim..

Zim: Yes? Will you tell me?

Coda: No, shut up!

Zim: You cannot tell the Amazing Zim, what to do, Human Filth!

Coda: -looks beyond screen, to watch the people reading her fanfics and whispers to them- I'm just gunna try something. You'll laugh, you know you will. Watch this! –turns back to Zim-

Zim: Who are you talking to? I demand you tell me, Human-Pig! –raises fist in the air-

Coda: -giggles and blows the alien a kiss- 3

Zim: -covers face with arms, and back into corner, as a random little red heart floats over to him, and explodes in his face, showering him with sparkly stuff- Nuu! Horrible human affection, the pain! Ahhh, I'm contaminated! Stupid, stinkn' Human! -opens one eye- Wait, it doesn't hurt! What is this?

Coda: -unzippers human suit, to reveal true Irken self- Haha!

Zim: You're Irken! What is the meaning of this..this..thing!

Coda: -giggles- Zimmy, you make me laugh.

Zim: -eyes strange Irken female and looks annoyed and confused at the same time- Don't call me that insulting name..

Kar: -walks behind them all, and Zim who points at her (not knowing who she is), but no one notices-

Coda: -blows Zim another kiss, and laughing softly, as he covers himself before another exploding heart comes- Anyway, here's the Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim (Property of Jhonen Vasquez), or any of the characters, except my lovely creation, Kar. -claps- Oh, and her robot, whom you all have yet to meet! Hold onto your squeedallyspouch (is that what it is, lol), 'cause the next chapter is on it's way! Please review, no flames! –takes out flame extinguisher, as a pre-caution-


	2. The Transmission

The transmission

"My Tallest, we have an incoming call from Irk. Shall I put it on screen?" Questioned an Irken co op. He was head of that department, controlling all the calls and messages that the Tallest received, on the Massive. Red and Purple looked up, from their snacking. "Is it urgent? We're kinda busy, here!" Purple replied, annoyed.

"Yes, My Tallest. On screen, now."

The image of an Irken female appeared, on the large screen in front of the pair. Both the leaders gawked at the figure, but finally Purple spoke. "W…who are you?" He asked his mouth full of food, some of it falling out of his mouth. His words, which sounded more like "Moo mar moo?", the female seemed to understand his question.

"Invader Kar, Graduate of the Academy, Sir." This meant she had trained, at the Academy for Future Invaders. The Tallest had been alerted that they'd soon be speaking to the First. Both aliens assumed her identity.

"W…wh…what do you w…want, I…I…Invader K…K…Kar?" Red spoke, this time. He was lucky, for Purple seemed at a loss for words. You see, this Irken was not only a female, which they rarely had, as invaders, but she was like none they'd ever seen!

Yes, Kar had that same light green skin, like everyone else, of their race, with a pair of black antennae that curled, in a spiky way. Something was glinting on one, and the Irken Leaders weren't sure what it was. It resembled a human earring. This "earring" was gold, and had a blue gem-like circle embedded inside. Kar was clothed in a sky blue and black, a most unusual combination, for an Irken, much less an Invader, I might add. A silver dog tag hung round her neck, shinning in the light. However, this was not the most peculiar thing about her, it was her eyes. They were not the normal red, or even purple…they were…orange!

Now this was a colour, on an Irken that is so rare, few have ever seen it. Sometimes, when a smeet (an Irken child) is created in the Machine, it comes out…different. The DNA of the two parents sometimes changes and creates this odd baby. Apparently, Kar was one of those smeets. Differences, like those Kar possessed, weren't feared, as in human society, but appreciated. They were rare things that deserved to be praised, honored, even. Differences showed originality, to its most blunt point and marked an unusually gifted Irken.

"I'd like to prove myself worthy of the title of an Invader. Are there no planets I can conquer, My Tallest?"

The Tallest hovered there, looking at each other. "W…we will talk about it." Then, they began a counsel, over the subject. "She's a bit small!" Purple complained.

"Not as small as Zim. We need a good invader, like Kar!" Red retorted.

"Zim! That gives me an idea. Perfect! We can send her to Earth, and she can take over!"

"You're absolutely right! We must act! To Earth she goes. And she could…" Red took a breath, and turned around, to face the screen and the waiting Kar. "We have decided to allow you, to take on a mission. You will go to a distance planet, called Earth. There, you will take care of a…little problem for us, known as Zim and take control of Earth, which was once his conquest. Claim it and all of its inhabitants for the Irken race. We will send the armada after you, to finish up and collect slaves." While speaking, Red mentally felt happy he wasn't stuttering. It was so terribly embarrassing! Kar, however, was used to getting stares and odd behavior around her.

"Yes, My Tallest!" she said, with a noble salute. "Thank you for this opportunity. You won't be let down, I promise you! Invader Kar, signing off!" With that, the screen grew dark. Purple and Red laughed.

"Finally! We will be rid of Zim!" The two did an odd sort of victory dance, while munching on donuts.

Author's Notes:

Coda: Hello, all! Yes, another cliff-hanger. Sadly, you will have to wait, just like all the other dirt-mokneys out there.

Zim: Yesss…Dirt-monkeys. Hey, that's actually a good one. Can I use that?

Coda: ' Sure.

Zim: Yesss! Another insult for Zim's collection!

Coda: Why do you talk about yourself, in third person, Zimmy?

Zim: Because I can! And stop calling me that! I am Ziimmmm!

Coda: -gives him a look and laughs evily-

Zim: -is lost-


	3. A Horrible New Student

A Horrible New Student

Miss Bitters, an old creepy-looking woman with pale skin, and gray hair, pulled back into a bun stood in front of her class. She was scowling, as usual. The door to the classroom opened, and a girl walked up to the teacher. "Class, the school board wants us to have more of you horrible, dirty children in one class, so we have a new student." The girl said nothing, which the others took, as odd. Normally, the new kid would introduce themselves. They wondered if she was just quiet. The class finally, responded, with a monotone greeting.

"Hmm, you'll need a seat. "Ah! You there," Miss Bitters walked around the room, glaring at each and every student. In turn, each child winced under her horrid gaze, hoping they wouldn't be chosen. She pointed one long, milky finger at a small kid with purple hair. "I never liked you. You get to be the transfer!" The poor child screamed, as their desk turned upside-down. When it righted itself, the student that had once occupied its seat, was gone. A shudder found its way, through the class. "There. Take your seat." Miss Bitters hissed.

Dib Membrane, son of the famous Professor Membrane was eyeing this new student. He alone noticed how funny it was, that each student they got, was weirder and weirder. Zim, our green-skinned alien in a bad disguise, was watching her, too. 'Something is very different about this new girl…' Thought Zim, as he turned in his desk to have a better view. He knew it wasn't only her look, either. Zim supposed he'd find out, in time exactly what was so…different.

Ironic as it was, her seat was almost directly next to Zim. She sat down, in the row next to his, one seat down from the first. This new student had long red hair, in a braid, which was resting on one shoulder, tied back with a black hair elastic. Her eyes were green, and she seemed to have purple eye shadow. Her skin was pale, and her ears pierced twice, and adorned with two silver earrings. Apparently, she was going for the punk look, and it suited her well. She wore a dress of blood red, with a white cross on it. The collar was black, and the sleeves were striped red and black. A chain linked from one side of her pocket to the other. Around her neck, hung, what looked like a silver dog tag. She wore pants underneath; they were stripped too, only with black and white. Her shoes were gray, and undecorated.

Unfortunately, Dib felt the same way, about this mysterious new kid. The girl scribbled something on a piece of scrap paper she'd pulled from her notebook, as Miss Bitters droned on, about the usual doom. Zim peeked over his shoulder, to see what it was. The "it", turned out to be a poem. Before he could read it, however, the bell rang and the students made their way to lunch.

The lonely new kid, sat a table, alone and pulled out a paper-bag lunch. Many watched her with curious eyes, for everyone else always had the cafeteria food, including Zim. Dib wandered over to the girl. When he took he seat, she gave him an evil death glare that almost made him back-down.

"So, you're the new kid. What's your name?"

"Kar."

"Kar…like a car?"

"Yes." She replied, her eye twitching. It appeared that she'd rather punch something than continue this pointless conversation with this big-headed boy, but he wouldn't leave.

"Why were you so late?"

"I slept in."

"I don't even know who you are, so can you please leave?" This kid was stretching her patience.

"I'm Dib."

"That's fascinating." Kar answered, sarcastically, and looking bored. She turned from this Dib-child and wrote something.

"What are you doing?"

"Writing a poem."

"Can I see?" To shut him up, Kar handed over her scrap. Written in a funny, sort of neat, slanted print, was, indeed a poem. It went as follows.

_Death Day_

_Oh, has the world gone so wrong?_

_Darkness surrounds, engulfing its victims whole_

_Clawing and tearing, hate rages through_

_Claiming not the lives it has stolen past_

_Fear grips all, and all must bow_

_To the dealer of death, ruler of fate who sits above_

_Bow to slavery, stand and you shall fall_

_The darkness,_

_The darkness rules all_

Zim, who'd been listening, unknown to the others, sniffled. It was a beautiful poem that spoke of his very conquest, to destroy the human race and make them his slaves. He decided that he must examine this Kar, thoroughly.

"Very…dark." Dib said, rather nervously. He was unsure of this girl, Kar, as he was unsure of many things, now days. Could this Kar be another alien, or was she just one of those dark loners, who hate the world? After a few days at the skool, however she was accepted by the students and faculty, as the second choice.

Dib: -walks up behind them and pokes Coda's shoulder-

Coda: Yes, Dib?

Zim: -points at Dib- Ah, the Dib-Monkey! I swear, it's the size of a hippo, that thing!

Coda: His gargantuan head? Yes, it is big.

Dib: -makes a face- My head is NOT big! Can I talk now? I want to know when I'm gunna have a bigger part in the st--

Coda: You should accept your big-headed fate, My Pet. It will please your mistress.

Dib: Wha? Your pet? My…mistress? Who's that!

Coda: Me, of course!

Dib: I'm not you're slave!

Coda: You will be in point five seconds..-counts down, and takes out notepad and writes Dib is her personal slave-

Dib: Yes, my Mistress?

Coda: Yesssss! Muhahaha! Get me a water, no, a shirly-temple. Those things are awesome!

Dib: -brings Coda soda- (ßwhich rhymes, teehee)

Zim: What? That's all I had to do? Aww, Cody! Why can't Dib be MY slave?

Coda: -smiles triumphantly- On occasion.

Zim: Excellent! Can I make him do something…now?

Coda: Yes.

Zim: Hit your big, fat head!

Dib: I hate you. –hits his head-

Everyone else: -laughs-

Coda: I don't own Invader Zim, Property of Jhonen Vasquez! Enjoy the story!


	4. Dib Gets Suscpicious

Dib gets suspicious

Kar had been at the skool for about two weeks now. Within that time, both Dib and Zim had been trying to find out more about this peculiar girl. Dib actually talked to her, while Zim, usually tried other methods that…well never worked. Anyway, there was a field trip being planned, and this was not something that made Miss Bitters happy. She hated field trips, and anything that gave her a reason to go outside, in the sun.

As usual Kar sat down at her lone lunch table, and took out her bag. Dib walked over to her, yet again. Kar let him, but made a face and told him that she wanted to kick him. He was used to this by now, but it was still weird.

"What, Dib?" she asked, giving him her evil death glare. It vaguely reminded him of Tak's "cat", when he'd first seen it by the window.

"Are you going on the filed trip?"

"Yes."

"Have you ever been to an aquarium, before?"

"No."

"They don't have them, in..er, wherever you came from?"

"No. Not in the city I lived in. And the teacher wouldn't allow field trips to it, anyway."

"Oh." Dib replied, disappointed. He wanted to catch her in something, but she was such a fox, that he had yet to. Actually, the more he talked to her, and the more he saw her around, the more normal she appeared. Dib was finally convinced she was most likely not another alien. Zim, however wasn't sure what on Irk he was searching for. He hadn't found it, either.

After lunch, the class filed back into class. Zita watched Kar, as she sat down. What was that, she was holding? Kar put it down. It was a paper, but she could not read what it said. She was too far away. Zim sat down, and looked at Kar, though his head was not turned. He could only see her out of the corner of his eye. Kar, who had odd senses about being stared at returned his, only hers was cold. He looked away. A few minutes later, however the same thing happened. Dib watched curiously, that whole day. He wanted to know why Zim was acting so odd. It had started when Kar had come to the class. He cornered the badly disguised alien, after the bell.

"Zim." He said, sounding accusing. "Why are you acting so weird?"

"Ah, the Dib-stink. What? Me? Weird? Never!"

"Actually, you always act weird, but you've been even weirder around Kar! What are you doing?"

"Nuh…nothing. I am Ziiimmm! I do not act weird around you, horrid human beasts!"

"Yes, you get all ner…" Dib gaped at the boy, whom he knew to be an alien. "Is it possible?" He ran his hand, through his sickle-shaped hair. "You…like a…human?"

"What? Zim likes no Earthlings. Zim will conquer you all!"

"You…you have a crush on a human. Wow! I never thought I'd see the day. Too bad you have to kill her." Dib said, in a voice that suggested he knew something Zim didn't.

"Yes, yes. You'll all be crushed." Zim replied, absently. "Kill who? All of you will die!"

"Kar." At this, Zim opened his mouth. Nothing came out. Finally he collected himself enough to give an answer.

"Yes, Kar will die too."

"But you like her!"

"I do not enjoy being in the company of any of you foul, Earth grubs." Zim stated.

"No, you don't get it. Don't you…" Dib wondered if he was wrong. "Don't you have any feelings for Kar?"

"What? Feelings toward a Human-pig? Never!" He didn't sound extremely convincing, so Dib give up the idea.

"Oh. Well, I think she'll believe me." Dib said, but he was thinking something else. 'Because I like her. She's…different than the others.'

"Then I shall take her away from you, and run tests on her! Muhahaha!"

Zim gave his infamous laugh, while one eye was half closed, and the other wide open. Dib just stared. He shouldn't have told him. Zim walked away, his feet lifting high in his usual odd-looking march. Dib chased after his sister, who'd been waiting for him.

"Gaz! I think Zim likes this new kid, Kar, who I like who…" Gaz looked up, as soon as he came, punched him in the stomach, and began to a beat up session.

"That's for making me wait!" she screamed, with a voice, full of anger. Dib swayed home, and fell on the couch. Was there a point to ever talking to his sister, if she always hit him, punched, jabbed him and basically beat him? He was used to it, but it didn't men he liked it.

Back at Zim's base, our favorite little alien was cooking us a new plan. He would finalize it at this, field trip. Zim had never been to an aquarium, and of course had no idea what it was. He thought it was some sort for military base, where they trained animals. He was yelling at Gir, for playing with his rubber moose, when he was supposed to be watching the containement levels of the viles. Gir's big cyan eyes watered, then he marched over to the viles and observed them. He poked at one, and it shattered. Suddenly, he was glowing a bright radioactive green.

"I do NOT like a filthy, human-snot. I will make sure Dib—" Zim entered the room. Gir was touching everything, making it glow like him. He was singing the doom song, which drove him insane. "Gir! Stop! Nuuu! Don't touch that! Don't press those!" Another crazy day, was ending. Dib climbed into his bed, and fell asleep. Zim, finally got Gir to stop, and cleaned him, was making him clean up. The next day was the field trip, and much would happen. As we know, with Zim, it will be hilarious and chaotic!

Author's notes:

Gir: -runs around screaming, in the background with a toy octopi on his head-

Zim: Gir! Come here, and stop that!

Gir: -goes on Zim's head and eats the toy-

Zim: -angry- Gir! Get off my perfect, normal head!

Coda: -picks up Gir and places him on the ground-

Gir: -looks up at Coda- Are you Master's Girlfriend?

Coda: -blushes- No, I'm just an author. I write stuff.

Zim: What is this..this friend-of-girl-thing?

Coda: -puts face on palm-

Zim: -innocently- What?

Dib: I hate you. –speaks to both aliens-

Coda: -pokes Dib and speaks sweetly- I hate you too, Dibby-Poo! 3

Zim: Nuuu! Don't touch the human-monster! You'll be contaminated!

Dib: -smirking- What? Are you jealous?

Zim: What? I did not speak of jelly?

Coda: I don't own Invader Zim, which is property of Jhonen Vasquez! Ok, now you can read the funniness! Oh, and Kar will have a bigger part in the next chappie. –blows kisses which explode and cover you with sparkly stuff-

Zim; Nuuu! Don't waste the sparkly-heart-thingies! We must use them, in our next plan to take over Earth!

Dib: WHAT! Nuuu! And I can't do anything! Nuuu!


	5. The Cheery Morning

The Cheery Morning

The next morning was oddly bright, and cheery, which made most of the students happy. Miss Bitters, on the other hand, was ready to kill. The sun was out, and there were few clouds. Some birds tweeted merrily, as the children came out of the skool and waited for the bus. It arrived in about five minutes, but Miss Bitters, who couldn't survive long in the sun waited inside, and had to be notified. She kinda floated out, wearing what looked like a black robe. Dib thought she looked like some kind of demon, like that. Kar got onto the bus, and took her seat. Much to her disapproval, Dib sat next to her.

"Hello." He began. "Isn't today beautiful?"

"I prefer the darkness." Kar replied, darkly.

"Oh, um. That sounds nice. Anyway, I wanted to know if you—"

Zim was in the seat behind the pair, listening to them. Sorry if that makes him kinda like a stalker, but in some ways, he was.

"believe in the um…paranormal. I do, and see, Zim…I don't know how anyone else can't see it! I mean, it's so obvious!"

"Lies! He tells lies!" Zim yelled. Dib turned around, and saw Zim. They had a glaring match. Zim won, because Dib looked at Kar, who was now speaking.

"Yes. And Zim is weird. He probably is an alien. And he stares at me."

"Lies!" Sounded behind them. Air rushed out of Kar's nostrils as she turned around, to face Zim.

"Stop listening in on a conversation that doesn't concern you."

"But it does. Oh, how it does." Dib looked at the two of them.

"Yeah, ya know, it actually does!" Kar fixed her glare upon Dib, who shut his mouth.

"Both of you annoy me."

"I do not!" They said, in unison. Then they would do the glare match. Glare. See, there is it! I told you! Oh, fine back to what happens.

Kar turned around, and stared blankly at the driver's seat in front of her. The rest of the ride was uneventful. Skreeetch! The tires stopped, and the class got out. Everyone one thanked the driver, except Kar, who fixed him with an odd look. This creeped him out, and she smiled. Zim, wondered why this pleased her.

The class stood in front of a large building. There was a clear glass part, mostly filled with water. Some seals swam around in it. The class migrated over there, to watch. Zim pushed his face, into the glass. The smallest seal came over, and inquisitively nosed the container. Zim back away. The children ogled over its cuteness, but the three misfits stood back. Kar made a path, through the hordes of kids and took a look at the creature. It waved a flipper at the girl, and she looked at it. One hand outstretched, and she touched the cold glass, the seal trying to smell her fingertips through it.

Miss Bitter finally got everyone attention, and they stood in line for stamps. Each child held out its wrist, and the volunteer stamped it. On Zim's turn, however he flinched. The stamp! It burned. Tears went into his eyes but did not fall. They jut, kinda welled up in them. Dib and Kar followed Zim without a commotion. The teacher took off her robe, and stared at the group of kids. "Go away! Come back in two hours, when we leave."

The group dispersed, leaving Dib, Kar and Zim. Kar went for a display of jelly fish, and scribbled on a notepad. Zim, who was looking at other things was doing the same thing. Dib eyed them both. 'Nah, couldn't be. Kar isn't an alien, taking notes on our water species..' He followed Kar, and she kept telling him to get lost. He only smiled stupidly. Kar's eye twitched. Zim, who followed them from behind, kept a safe distance. He stared at the odd water creatures, writing on the pad, and looking for something to show that they were indeed trained by the military. Of course, he wouldn't find what he was looking for, but most find it amusing to watch Zim search for things, without avail.

Suddenly, they turned at the sound of a loud gasp. It was from Zim. "What is this!" He was looking wide-eyed at a puffer fish that went from its shrimpy size, to blow up and become a spiked ball, with fins. "It just became big! Like Dib's head!" The students from his skool, around them laughed. Dib narrowed his eyes, at Zim. The alien returned to marveling at the blow fish. Dib was telling Kar about his theories on things, and she listened, partly. Kar wanted information about Earth, before she took over Zim's mission. Even this odd babble Dib spoke of, must be helpful. That was the only, and I mean only reason she put up with him, at all.

"So you believe me?"

"Sure."

"Really?"

"Yes, Dib. Now, shut up."

Dib did shut up. Zim walked up to him, as one of the sharks passed. Zim cringed, thinking it could come out, when it wanted to. This large, can-shaped container was filled with water, and had a man-made reef in it. Rays, eels, tropical fish and a couple sharks swam inside. Zim pointed a gloved finger at Dib, and said rather loudly.

"I think it is you, who is liking a human, Dib-monkey."

Kar turned, mildly interested at why Zim was yelling, however he tended to do that a lot. Dib blushed. "Ah ha! Your face is going pink. I am right! Victory for Zim…" Kar's eye brows shot up. Was she hearing correctly? Maybe she was right, for she suspected this, long ago. It had proved partly useful. Kar fixed her emerald gaze on the boy shouting.

She had assumed at once this was the very Zim was supposed to compete with. It didn't seem like much of a match. Obviously, the Tallest wanted a good invader. Why they sent Zim here, she had yet to find out. Why Zim could even be called an invader was the real question Kar wanted to know, but this was not something you could just ask. Especially since she'd fooled Dib, so far. Zim was too obvious in everything he did. She wondered how everyone hadn't figured out he was an alien yet.

Zim shouted again. Dib shouted back. This was so annoying!

"I do not!"

"Yes you."

"Do not!"

"Do too!" It sounded like the kind of thing you'd hear from 3 year olds. Kar shook her head and walked off. Soon Dib joined her, and although Zim didn't want to admit it, he didn't like seeing his arch nemesis anywhere near Kar. Was it possible…had he true fallen for a human?

After looking at countless marine life, the class went back to the spot where they were supposed to meet Miss Bitters. She was there, with her robe back on, and the hood over her head. "We leave now, you rats." She hissed, as the kids chatted on their way out. Zim, stuck to following Dib and Kar like their shadows. It was bothering Dib, but Kar hadn't said anything about it. She must have noticed, though. Dib wondered vaguely, why she chose not to speak of it. Maybe she hated Zim that much. He hoped so.

Like the last time the students got of the bus, Kar gave the bus driver a look. When he tried to inch away in his seat, she looked triumphant. Miss Bitters led the class inside. A second after entering their room, the dismissal bell rang. The kids went crazy, running through the halls, and climbing out windows. It was the usual chaos, however. Dib turned, after putting on his backpack. "What's that fun, Kar?"

"Fun?" Kar repeated. "It was…interesting."

Zim rubbed his hands together and talked to himself. "Yes…very interesting…"

Author's Note:

Coda: Ta-da! Ok, I don't like this chapter too much, but oh well. It's long, too!

Zim: How dare you make it seem like I have crush on this, Kar-thing. She's a human! Of all things, an Irken makes me like a Human.

Coda: Zim, you might want to go to the next chapter…-hint hint-

Zim: -suspicious- Why?

Coda: -not telling and sounding mysterious- You'll see.

Zim: Nuuu! Tell me! I demand you tell meeeee!

Coda: Oh, and I do not own Invader Zim, which is property of Jhonen Vasquez.

Zim: What? I am owned? –confused-


	6. Stalking in Shadows

Stalking in Shadows

Zim had decided to follow Kar, after skool. He saw her bright red head, and followed it through the partly crowed side-walk. She knew very well he was there, and was just pretending she didn't. Kar even looked back every once in a while, like she knew something was there, but couldn't tell what. Poor Zim, being occasional moron is he, was fooled.

Zim hid behind a tree (which was too skinny for him to hide well behind), as Kar turned around again. She went on walking. Finally she went down a street, this street Zim had passed many times. Kar went up to a door and into a house. It was a normal looking one

that had been there even before Zim's. Somehow, Zim knew it was different. Alien senses, maybe? Anyway, he crept closer. Zim stood behind a bush and looked in the window. The interior of the house was normal. Zim saw a tiny dog run up to her. At first Zim thought it was moving carpet, for its fur covered its legs completely, so it looked like it was floating. The dog had a fluffy tail, big black nose, and beady-looking eyes. Around its neck was a red, spiked collar.

"Hmm. Nothing out of the ordinary. I shall wait!" Zim declared to no one.

"Come on, Zat. Let's go upstairs." The grey dog barked, and floated up the staircase. Kar opened the door to a room, it was a bedroom. Zim followed, using his pak's jets. Zat quivered, as if it were cold. The bedroom door shut, and the room could be seen clearly. Kar's bedroom didn't match her punked out appearance. It was all…high tech. Zat quivered again. So did Kar. It kept going, and their images grew mutilated.

"What is going on?" Zim asked, the air.

Suddenly it stopped. There stood a shiny, and small robot. It was accented with orange, and had the Irken symbol for an Invader on its forehead, which was also in orange. A stripe of matching colours, fitted to its no-attached legs. Zim stared at the robot. This could only mean one thing. He looked at Kar. Only, it wasn't the Kar he knew, that stood there. It was an Irken female, but she was so odd it made Zim even more curious. Kar, was an Invader? What could this mean?

Zim eyed Kar more closely. Actually, I suppose I should called her Invader Kar, for now. Her skin was the Irken trademark, and she had the right outfit. Her pack was silver and a sky blue. Kar's antennae were pointed and curled, one having some kind of a dangling earring. It was a tiny and gold, with a blue circle in the middle. Kar's outfit, was the same blue was her pak. She also had black, in it too. Her gloves had a single strip of blue, and her boots had attachments that looked like blue straps. Her top was blue, with a black collar, and shoulders. Kar's stripped sleeves matched well. Zim noticed she had something like a black coat-tail attached to the back, of her top. Her pants were grey, and tightly fitted. Another piece of metallic jewelry hung around the invader's neck. It was a dog tag, just like the one the human-Kar wore. It must be the same. What made him really flip, were her eyes. For they weren't the usual purple or even red. They were orange. It suited her, and made him marvel. That second, Zim realized she was once one of Those Smeets (or a TS). Those Smeets were unnaturally made, from the tube. Just had all invaders. They were different however, and showed that the smeet was destined to be great. Zim gasped, as she turned her head towards the window. He used his spider-legs and quickly hid. Then, Zim walked back to his home-base, rather dazed and confused.

3 Author's Note:

Zim: Hey! I am NOT a moron!

Koda: -pats Zim's head, fondly-

Zim: -squirms away- Don't do that, Koda. I'm not your pet-slave-thing!

Koda: -laughs and blows him another kiss- 3 teehee

Zim: -looks annoyed as the pink heart blows up in his face-

Koda: Zimmy! You're all sparkly!

Zim: (looking much like this: --") Yes, so I am.

Kar: -stares at the two-

Zim: Nuuu! I can explain!

Kar: Isn't that the writer?

Koda: Yes I am.

Kar: And she calls you, "Zimmy"? Are you trying to bribe her?

Koda: --" Well, he calls me Kody…so we're even.

Kar: -raises invisible eyebrow- Kody? Ok, Zim. I'm leaving. Don't want to be interrupting…anything.

Zim: -chases after Kar, trying to get to stop-

Koda: Sad that the only fun thing I can do is torture Zim. Oh well. Take it way, Disclaimer, so I don't have to!

Disclaimer: -a funny deep male voice speaks- Koda does not own Invader Zim, he and all the other characters, except Kar and her robot, are property of Jhonen Vasquez.


	7. The Unknown Truth

The Unknown Truth

The next day, Zim made an attempt to act as he usually did, or what others considered "normal" for him. Kar, who didn't know he stayed long enough to see her true self was the same towards him, as was Dib. That day, Zim wasn't the only one trying to get Kar's attention, and you lucky people get to hear what happened!

Kar walked out of the classroom. Another pointless day, at a pointless planet. She walked to her locker, and turned the combination. Dib appeared, seemingly out of no where and waltzed over. "Hello, Kar." Kar turned around and glared at him, then got out her backpack. "Um, can I talk to you? Now?" Kar stopped. She gave an almost unnoticeable shudder, and turned to face him. Dib opened his mouth, but wasn't permitted to begin. Zim pushed him out of the way, and into the locker. Smack! His head left and indent on the locker. Dib's vision was blurred, and his head felt like it was spinning. Although the evil laugher he heard, he could tell who had done this. "Zim."

Kar said nothing, but was mentally grateful that Zim was being himself, for once. "Ignore the Dib-monkey. He has been crazier, than usual." Dib got up, on his shaky feet. "You jerk." With that, Dib fell over, Zim had already walked off and Kar was leaving. Did she not care, that the boy who liked her was hurt? Then again, she didn't know, well according to Dib. The truth was Kar knew very well, Dib liked her, but he was no use to her, as of yet. Zim on the other, she thought he was just being…more mean to Dib. Kar walked home and went inside, welcomed by a jumping gray dog.

Zim, decided he'd got to her house, that way he could break it to her, nicely. So, Zim leashed up Gir, who was screaming 'walkies' and passed by her street. Then he glanced around, to see if the coast was clear. It was. He went for it. He raised one gloved hand, and extended a finger. Ring. The doorbell sounded, and he heard footsteps. The door opened, and Kar stood there, leaning on the doorway. "Zim? What do you want?"

That was the longest few words he'd heard out of her mouth, so far.

"Yes. I am Ziimm!" A single eyebrow rose on Kar's pale face. He went on. "I walked walking my dog, here." Zim pulled on the leash, and Gir with it, so she could see, he in deed had a dog. "And I thought I might stop by."

"How did you know where I live?" Sweat drops trickled down his green face.

"I um.."

"Followed me." Kar finished for him. "Yes, I knew it was you. Come in before someone notices you." Zim shrugged. Hey, it was an invitation at least. He followed her, dragging Gir, on the ground. He bumped up, as he went over each step.

"So, Zim. Why are you here?" Gir squeaked over to Zat, who was barking and running around Gir. "Yay! Doggy!" Gir said, in his normal voice. Zim smacked his forehead. That dumb dog! Kar said nothing, but watched Gir. 'That is his robot's disguise?' Zim opened his mouth, only to close it again. He did this twice. "The reason why we're here…is because…" He fixed his fake contacts on her. "Kar, I know you're an invader, like me."

'Like you? Ha, you aren't a REAL invader, Zim.' However what she said was different. "I see. How long have you…known?"

"Well, when I first met you, no, when I first saw you, I knew something was different."

"Very good, Zim. Now, I suppose you'll be wanting to know why I'm on Earth?" Zim nodded.

She really wasn't too much like how she'd pretended to be. Kar was an invader, true, but she cared about things, which made her better at it. The hardcore invaders, tended to be so ruthless and cruel, that nobody ever liked them, and feared them, all the time. Kar was only about half like how she was pretending. True, she hated the world (Earth, that is), and wanted humans to die, but she wasn't going to tell Zim the truth. It was funny. When she first met Zim, she thought she'd be able to break that overly-proud little heart of his, but she couldn't. She knew him, and he probably wouldn't believe her anyway. The Tallest wouldn't tell him, so no one else would. It was, for Zim and unknown truth. She'd lie. Why? She wasn't sure.

"I'm here to…I was sent by the Tallest to help you conquer Earth."

"Zim needs no help!"

"It wouldn't hurt." Kar said, trying not to sound too harsh. Zim caved.

"Fine, but I get to do the most part. And what's with you and the Dib-slug?"

"He likes me, as in who-know-what, and I think it might prove useful."

"Yes, gain his trust, then every time he tries to stop me—"

"Us."

"Yes, us. I'll know his plans. Perfect!" Kar nodded.

"So, what are your plans now?"

"Now? Ah, yes. Wait—how do I know you won't double-cross me?" Zim's fake human eyes narrowed.

"First, remove your disguise. It's bothering me."

"Cameras? Do you have cameras?" Kar gave him a look, which obviously meant no. Her image smudged and revealed her alien form. Zim, had taken off the wig and contacts.

"You know, you don't look so bad without the stupid disguise."

"Stupid? Wait, was that a compliment hidden in there…somewhere?"

"Maybe." Zim was a bit confused. "Anyway, you want me to swear it?"

"Yes."

"Fine. I swear on…Mother Irk, that I will no betray you." This pleased him.

"Where you a TS?" Zim asked, not realizing this could sound rude.

"Yes. See the eyes.." Kar pointed to her eyes, and Zim stared. They were kinda mesmerizing, those eyes. The invader snapped her fingers. "Zim…Ziiiimmmmm." He blinked.

"Oh, right."

"Welcome back."

"Huh?"

"Never mind." Zim looked at her, again. She really wasn't so bad. At least she wasn't like Tak, who put human food on him. "Oh, it's late. You'd better go. Don't act like you know anything at skool, ok?"

"Hmm? Yes, yes. Don't want to alert the Dib-scum."

Zim put back on his silly, black wig and contacts. Then he grabbed Gir, who was dancing with an unwilling Zat and walked to the door. "Victory for Ziiiimm!" He shouted, and Kar pushed him out the door, so the alien would leave. Finally he did, and began his walk home. Then, since it was late, he order Gir to go into Rocket Mode and he shot off, into the sky. Kar, who watched them, chuckled. She went to sleep, wanting to know why she didn't just crush his proud exterior. Under normal circumstances, she would have, being on an actually mission from the Tallest, but then again, Zim was anything but normal.

Author's Note:

Coda: Yay it was long! –likes longer chapters- Alright, I'll start off with saying, I do not own Invader Zim (property of Jhonen Vasquez). I Do, however own Kar and Zat.

Gir: Hewwwuuu! –waves arms wildly-

Coda: Hello Gir! '

Gir: Hi! I like cheese!

Coda: Me too!

Gir: Do ya got any cheeesssee?

Coda: -checks pockets, find a slice and hands it to Gir-

Gir: -eats cheese-

Zim: Gir! There you are! You know aren't supposed to go off on your—Ahhhh! Coda!

Coda: Hello Zimmy. Don't worry, Gir was just having a slice of cheese with me.

Zim: I was wondering were my cheese went. --"

Coda: --

Zim: Have you seen the Dib-stink?

Coda: No.

Dib: Did someone call me?

Zim: Ah, there's the big-headed-mutant-pig I was looking for.

Dib: Hey! My head is—

Zim: Not big? Ha! It's bigger than I remember. I think it grew..

Dib: It did not!

Coda: Dudes! –keeps both part-

Kar: -walks by, then realizes who they are and comes back- Um…

Zim and Dib: -both trying fruitlessly to tear at each other-

Coda: ' Yeah, they want to kill each other, again. Here take Zim! –grabs Zim's arm and hands him to Kar-

Kar: -drags Zim away-

Dib: Thanks! Hey, aren't you an alien?

Coda: Why yes, how good of you to finally notice, seeing as I'd have my costume off, for, oh, most of the chapters! You'd think you'd be smarter with that big head of yours.

Dib: It's NOT big! –huffing and puffing-

Coda: Yes it is. Oh, and the only thing I'm looking to take over is my fanfics, so buh-bye. –claps hands-

Dib: Nuuu! –is servant again-

Coda: Ok, Dib. Now sing a song, about your big head.

Dib: Nuuu! –tries to resist but the slave-power is too strong and he sings a song about how big his head is-

Zim: -who is still far away, and can somehow hear us, is laughing-


End file.
